Monday, July 11, 2016

The Tinder Games –The Background

The Background

This all started as a joke July 4th weekend –over Maryland blue crabs and beer, I thought it’d be funny to download Tinder and pass it around. Tinder “roulette,” if you will. This madness was inspired by the lady sitting across the table from me, who’d just broken up with someone and mentioned her unhappy, reluctant return to the wilds of Tinder.

I’ll admit to a passing engagement with all the dating apps, every few years or so, mostly out of curiosity and with zero patience whatsoever. Lots of swiping left, needless to say, with some hysterically bad dates peppered in for extra flavor. I’d max out at 3 bad dates, and then call it quits.

On this past Sunday, the 3rd of July 2016 to be exact, I rejoined the fray, expecting absolutely nothing beyond a few more dating horror stories to add to my collection. They’re great for parties; why not?

No one else that night took me up on the Tinder “roulette” challenge, but no matter. The only two married ladies at the long picnic table gleefully took to the “dating game.” They chose my pictures; they wrote my profile text; they did all the swiping; and, they even did all the initial messaging.

The rest of us drank our beer and watched the neighborhood fireworks. Mostly, I found the whole thing hilarious, with the potential for fueling casual backyard parties in the summer weeks still to go this year. Why the heck not? No reason I could think of!

I crawled into bed around 6a.m. and didn’t give it another thought. Until I woke up around noon on Monday with 4 legit dates, 3 of which turned out to be sincere. (The 4th only wanted to hook up (of course). And… hard pass on the 4th (of course).)

The party joke had suddenly become serious –or had it?

The messages that had been exchanged between the two married ladies and my potential beaus were laugh-out-loud hysterical. My profile was (and still is) borderline PG13. With more of it leaning on the “wrong” side of PG13 than not.

Pictures of me holding tampons? Check.
Pictures of me food baby pregnant? Check.
Pictures of me drinking watermelon vodka directly from a pitcher? Check.
Pictures of me possibly (pretend) chocking someone with a stuffed fish? Check.

For a blog I intend to keep PG, I’m pretty sure I can’t describe the rest of my actual profile.

My curiosity was piqued; my inner anthropologist excited. What was going on here? I’d been online before (name the dating site, including Tinder) with no luck whatsoever. I’d chosen the pictures, I’d written the text, I’d done the swiping (mostly to the left), and the messaging.

Had I inadvertently stumbled upon The Secret to online dating!?

Age a few years (which is death for women trying to date online, where the preferred age for men seeking women is 23 years old… or less), give control of your online identity to two happily married women, and do no swiping whatsoever of your own?

I realize I’m here to discuss Date #1, but to illustrate the point, I sit here typing this having had not 1 or 2 good dates, but in fact –3 solid 1st dates. Seriously. In less than the span of a week. In fact today, Monday, 11 July 2016, is exactly one week out from the day this game turned into a legit experiment.



So Date #1. I should get to that.

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